Bakura At Burger King
by Silver-Haired-Thief
Summary: This is a normal day at Bakura's job. And guess where he works! Burger King. Thiefshipping if you squint really, really hard. Lots of abridged references. I don't own anything! One-shot.


**Bakura At Burger King**

Bakura walked into Burger King for his job as he always did.

"Yo Bakura, dude take drive thru today!" Ryou said.

Bakura gave him a strange look. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I'm trying to sound more American so people won't pick on me as much." He replied.

Bakura rolled his eyes.

"Whatever." Bakura said.

Then he walked to the drive thru station, muttering things about the shadow realm and bull shit.

He put on his little headset that he always had trouble putting on. For some reason, the headset had white kitty ears on it and that irritated the hell out of him.

After a few minutes, he heard Anzu screaming.

"HELP RYOU'S GONE INSANE!"

Bakura then laughed as the first person pulled up to the drive thru.

They were in a white car.

"Hello may I take your bloody order?" Bakura asked.

"Yeah I'll have a whopper with nothing on it." The man said.

"Right." Bakura said.

"Whopper with nothing on it!" He shouted back.

Luckily for him, Tristan was working the kitchen that day.

When Bakura opened the window to give the guy his food, he was surprised at who he saw.

"Kaiba?"

Kaiba looked up. "Bakura? Well it doesn't surprise me that YOU'D be working here."

Bakura growled slightly. "Why the bloody hell are you here? Shouldn't you be at some bloody fancy restaurant with some money bagging whore?"

"Screw the whores, I have money!"

Bakura laughed at what he said.

Kaiba then realized what he had said and just said, "Just give me my food or you're fired."

Bakura rolled his eyes and gave the CEO his food.

He drove off quickly.

Two minutes later, he came back into the restaurant, pissed.

Anzu, who was at the front desk, was surprised at how angry Kaiba was.

"WHAT KIND OF BULL SHIT IS THIS?! JUST A BUN?!" Kaiba shouted.

Anzu called back for Tristan and asked him what had happened.

"He asked for a whopper with nothing on it." Tristan said simply.

"I didn't mean it like that you dumb fuck!" Kaiba yelled.

Tristan looked hurt at this and sniffled. "I'm sorry!"

Anzu comforted him. "I'm sorry Mr. Kaiba, we don't allow such foul language here. Please leave."

Kaiba looked stunned. "No! I want my burger!"

Anzu glared at him before yelling, "BLAH BLAH FRIENDSHIP BLAH BLAH! FRIENDS BLAH! FRIENDSHIP BLAH AWESOME BLAHHHH!~~~!"

"Ahhh!" Kaiba yelled as he ran out.

~With Bakura~

"What do you bloody want again sir?"

"SIR?! I am a woman, thank you! My breasts are offended!"

Bakura rolled his eyes. "Just bloody order already."

"My breasts want a milkshake."

"Is that all your breasts want?"

"Yes."

"Pull around to the bloody front then before I send you and your breasts to the Shadow Realm." Bakura said.

When the woman was given her food (she turned out to Mai), another person pulled up to the drive thru.

"May I take your bloody order?"

"Do you have fries here?"

"ON MOTORCYCLESSSSS!"

"Jack!"

"Yusei!"

"No."

"Just tell me what you bloody want." Bakura said impatiently.

"Fries and a burger."

"Pull up to the first window." Bakura said boredly.

Up at the first window were Jack and Yusei, both on one motorcycle.

Bakura walked to the window and gave them their food.

"Hey dude that's a bloody nice motorcycle-"

Yusei rolled his eyes. "You're not riding it."

Bakura shrugged. "It was worth a shot."

"Yuseiiiiiiiii!"

"What Jack?"

"CARD GAMES ON MOTORCYCLESSSSS!"

"..."

Yusei then drove off.

Bakura looked after them for a moment then went back to taking people's orders.

"Hello. Can I take your bloody order?" Bakura asked.

"Hm.. I wonder what time it is."

"Order something and I can tell you." Bakura said.

"I want a soda."

"Pull up to the bloody window." Bakura said.

When he looked outside to give the person the food, he was surprised at who he saw.

It was Yugi at the window.

"Bakura?!"

"Yeah. What bloody of it? Haven't you ever seen an evil villain working at a bloody drive thru facility?" Bakura asked.

Yugi looked at him strangely. "Can you tell me what time it is?"

"No. Bugger off now will you?" Bakura said.

"WHY CAN'T ANYONE EVER TELL ME THE TIME?!" Yugi shouted, as he drove off.

Bakura stared at him for a moment, but then started paying more attention to his post.

As the next person pulled up, Bakura said his usual line.

"My name's Jaden Yuki. And I'm absolutely flawless!"

"I didn't ask for your bloody name. I just want to bloody know what you bloody want to eat." Bakura said.

"Ain't nobody in the world as fly as me."

"Bloody greeeat. Now order." Bakura said, his patience wearing thin.

"Bitches just line up to get a glimpse of my sweet moves."

"ORDER ALEREADY OR I WILL SUCK THE BLOODY HAPPY RIGHT OUT OF YOUR BLOODY SOUL!" Bakura shouted.

There was a pause.

"Is there any flawless food?"

Bakura groaned and clenched his teeth. "Yes there bloody is. The whoppers are."

"Then I want a flawless whopper. With no pickles. Pickles aren't flawless."

"What the bloody hell ever. Drive to the front." Bakura mumbled out.

Bakura quickly gave Jaden his food.

"Thanks dog! This shit be ballin'!" He exclaimed, beaming.

Bakura looked confused at what he said.

"RYOU WHAT DID HE SAY?"

"He said that this shit be ballin' dude." Ryou said.

Bakura groaned and gave up. Obviously Ryou was still being stupid.

Jaden then drove off.

Finally it was the final hour of Bakura's shift.

The final guy he had to cover was pulling up.

"Hello may I take your bloody order?" Bakura asked.

"Yeah I'll have a cheeseburger."

"That all?" Bakura asked hopefully.

"Actually I'll have some fries too." They said.

"Okay-"

"Actually no fries."

"Okay-"

"Actually yeah I'll have fries."

"Will you make up your bloody-" Bakura started, but he was interrupted once again.

"Actually no fries."

Bakura slammed his fist down on the counter. "HOW ABOUT I SHOVE SOME BLOODY FRIES DOWN YOURTHROAT!"

"BAKURA! Is this how you treat a customer?"

Bakura then realized who it was.

"Marik I'm gonna kill you."

"With fries." Marik said.

Bakura then threw the head set out of the window.

~Afterwards~

Bakura rode home on Yusei's motorcycle.

When he got off, he looked at Yusei.

"I thought you said that I couldn't bloody ride your bike." Bakura said.

Yusei crossed his arms.

"Everybody gets one."

That is a normal day for Bakura at work.

-Later, with Bakura and Marik-

"Bakura thanks for the burger today!"

"Oh bugger off! Why don't you do use your bloody Celtic Guardian?" Bakura snapped.

"WHY DON'T YOU USE YOUR CELTIC GUARDIAN?! WHY DOESN'T YOUR _MOTHER_ USE THE CELTIC GUARDIAN?! OH NO I DIDN'T!" Marik shouted.

Bakura blinked.

"I'm sassy today." Marik said.

"I can tell." Bakura said.

**~The End~**

**I enjoyed writing that :3**

**Please review and tell me how I did.**

**XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXD XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXD XDXD**


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